Cocktail Weenies

The current time is 4:40 p.m. -- in exactly 1.5 hours I will be arriving at a cocktail function for Adam's work...

Despite my persistent avoidance of salt over the last few days and the insane amounts of water I have consumed -- it's happening again.

My feet are swelling, and they look like GIANT sausages.

(notice the absence of an ankle bone and the bulging that occurs around the toe area of my left foot)

To make matters worse, the dress I had recently named my "maternity cocktail dress" which was a regular dress, just in one size bigger than I normally wear, no longer fits in a satisfactory manner (I determined this at about 8pm last night). So, my lunch break was spent digging through sale racks at over priced maternity boutiques looking for something that did not scream "HEY LOOK AT THE PREGGO IN THE COCKTAIL DRESS THAT EMPHASIZES HER BELLY WAY MORE THAN IT SHOULD (AND NOT IN AN ATTRACTIVE WAY)!"

Women SHOULD NOT have to attend anything fancy when they are pregnant. UNLESS, they have a beauty team consisting of a stylist, hair stylist and make up artist. I, unfortunately, do not.

What I do have is my loving husband who shrugs at my whining and tells me I look great. Then, walks back into the room to add "and it will be dark in there so no one will be able to see you." Which makes sense to a logical person...but, to a girl hopped up on hormones that translates into "you do look huge and your sausage feet freak me out, let's hope the darkness hides them from the other party-goers". And, I have to remind myself that I am not capable of logical thinking right now and need to focus on what he said and not what I heard!

So - one last glance in the mirror and we are out the door (only 20 minutes behind schedule)!

We arrive at the event and Adam was right...it is too dark for people to see my feet! And, the tablecloths are long so I can hide them while we are eating dinner.

During one of three trips to the bathroom (in a 1.5 hour time span) a woman stops to ask me where I found my dress. She explains that she was pregnant at this event last year and was about to burst out of the black dress she wore. She says my dress is very elegant and that I look beautiful.

That just made my whole day! I tell Adam about the woman when we get back to the car and he says "oh she must have looked like you would have if you would have worn the other dress (referring to the one that was recently retired)". (Sigh)...he's got some learning to do!

Here's what I am starting to learn about this whole pregnancy thing...it's what Adam has been preaching all along and I think he might actually be right (yep, I put that in writing):

The times when you really need to force yourself to get dressed and be social are when you feel like it's the absolute LAST thing in the world you want to do. It usually ends up being a good time and you ALWAYS feel better about yourself when you get home.

Pink It's My New Obsession*

* Title borrowed from the lyrics of Aerosmith's 1997 hit "Pink"...but used to describe my obsession for all things related to THE color for BABY GIRLS (not the subject matter of the original lyrics)!

Before we knew the sex of our baby, we had decided to pick a non gender specific color and theme to decorate the nursery. We were leaning toward green and possibly a monkey/jungle theme. After all, this is the more practical approach. Assuming the baby doesn't totally destroy the crib bedding and nursery contents with dirty bombs (aka: # 2 diapers) and puke -- we would be able to reuse it when, yes - that's right, the second tiny member of our family arrives.

Well, all of this logic and reason FLEW out the window the moment we found out we were having a baby girl. I googled baby bedding the very next day and it was like looking at it with a brand new pair of eyes. NOTHING would do except for PINK...with flowers...and lace and
ribbons....

This was all very shocking to me -- I have never been extremely girly; I HATED anything with lace or any other scratchy material [scratchy includes pretty much everything but cotton] since before I could even form sentences to express my discomfort; and, to this day it is VERY rare to catch me in pink-colored anything (except the n.a.p robe that Adam gave me -- I LIVE IN IT)!

Thankfully after a week or so -- the feelings towards flowers, lace and ribbons subsided -- and Adam gave up on the dream of an LSU-themed room (a story in itself). We compromised on BANANAFISH Bubble Gum!

A healthy balance of pinks, greens and yellows!

Not exactly up to par with J Lo's posh nursery (which was promptly nicknamed a "deathtrap" after professional photographs of the nursery were published), but we think it's the perfect fit for our baby girl!

The History of Chicken Nugget Toes (Abridged)

Someone once told me that everyone's toes fall into either of 2 categories:

Chicken Nuggets - stubby, rounded toes

OR

French Fries - long, slender toes

At a glance it is obvious which category I fall into -- stubbishly attractive chicken nuggets.

Adam, on the other hand, is clearly a member of the french fries clan. He has the longest toes I have ever seen...except for one -- that he broke when he jumped off a roof and landed on a hidden concrete step! So, he's a 9:1 ratio of fries to nuggets.

At our doctor's appointment 2 weeks ago, the technician printed pictures of Anna's hands and feet -- much to her daddy's delight -- she's clearly french fries material too.

So, I am outnumbered -- but, I am hopeful that we can fatten her up once she gets here and turn those toes into plump chicken nuggets.

In the event that she does not gain weight in her toes -- I can still share the joy of chicken nugget toes with anyone reading my posts!

Pictures to come!

Pregnancy is a Magical Experience?

I am the youngest in my family -- so, I never had the pleasure of observing my mom being pregnant. And, I never learned really anything at all about what it's like to be pregnant.

OH - except for this...when I was 7 or 8-ish, we found out my best friend's mom was pregnant! They announced it at school -- and everyone was REALLY excited. I went home that day with a load of "where do babies come from" type questions. Which, of course, I relayed to the one person who (in my mind) knew everything...my big sister, Kelly.

I don't remember the majority of that conversation, thankfully, but one answer she gave has been stuck in my mind for the last 16 years or so. I asked something along the lines of "does it hurt" or "what does it feel like"? And, with all the wisdom of her 15 years -- she responded...


"Like someone opening an umbrella from inside of you and pushing it out!"


Thanks Sis!

Now - we will never know for sure, but I am thinking that is when my fear of pregnancy began!

Basically, for 2/3rds of my life -- I have been very afraid of pregnancy in general. So, you can imagine my apprehension at the beginning of all this.

I started reading right away (BIG MISTAKE - but that topic deserves a post of it's own) and all these women were sharing stories about how "magical" pregnancy made them feel, how much they loved it, how they would volunteer to be a surrogate mother if only their husbands would let them...etc.

So, I thought -- maybe this whole pregnancy thing isn't as bad as I always thought it would be.

The month following that thought was filled with -- puking (in the shower, kitchen sink, yard and occasionally the toilet), being so tired that I could fall asleep at 7 pm with the TV, lights and barking dog all on, and waking up EVERY morning at 3 am to stuff my bottomless stomach (I once ate an entire cantaloupe in the middle of the night). And last, but most certainly not least, fainting at work and having just a small enough seizure-like episode that my co-workers called 911 just to be safe...the entire fire department from down the street and 2 ambulances arrived on the scene at approximately 9am -- when the rest of the people in our office complex were just pulling in to start their work day!

About 3 months in -- there was a week when I cried every single day. And not just like a little tear here and there, a full on emotional breakdown (which my fellow bump-mate and new cousin - Christine - warned me about). I was pretty sure that Adam was convinced I was totally insane, but he would sit with me and hug me and assure me that he still thought I was normal -- and offer to do just about anything he could think of to make me stop crying (husbands are the best).

Now, I do think these episodes were partially hormone-inspired -- but I was crying because I secretly HATED being pregnant and I felt more guilty about it than anything I have ever done in my entire life. There was nothing I could do to change my own mind/feelings. And, I felt like I couldn't tell anyone because they would think I was a terrible person. I'm used to being able to take challenges in stride, but this was different.

Finally - at the end of this tear-stained week - I spilled my guts to Adam in a conversation prefaced with "please don't be mad at me or think that I am horrible...BUT...". And then the most amazing thing happened -- he actually laughed at me (in an understanding way) and told me that he was pretty certain there were a lot of people that could relate to what I was feeling. Then, he gave me the best advice of all...to tell people the TRUTH when they asked how I was doing. Now, I was pretty skeptical about all of this because I think people generally expect questions like that to be answered in a positive, non-specific manner AND I didn't really want anyone feeling sorry for me...I prefer to throw private pity parties.But anyway -- I kept his advice in the back of my mind.

A week or so later another amazing thing happened...I was talking to another bump-mate of mine, Jaci, and I hesitantly confessed to her how much I hated being pregnant and how much I was struggling with how I felt. She responded to all of this with a big "ME TOO"!! What a huge relief!! It was on that day that we decided WE were normal and those other girls with their magical pregnancies were the REAL weirdos!

Shortly after this conversation took place, we found out we were having a girl, and I started to look more pregnant than disproportioned! I can't be certain if it was the comfort of realizing that it was OK to think pregnancy sucks, finding people who could identify with me, or getting a better grasp on the fact that there is a real baby girl growing inside of me, but for the last month or so -- my feelings towards pregnancy have been downgraded from hate to strongly dislike. Most importantly, I've stopped worrying and accepted the fact that I'm just not one of those girls who thrives on being pregnant. And, I am confident that both Jaci and I will love our baby girls more than anything in the world...even if we despise pretty much everything about being pregnant.

Now I can worry about more important things -- like saving for prom dresses and weddings, figuring out how we will fit all of the baby paraphernalia into one tiny closet...and figuring out what in the WORLD Braxton Hicks means (because according to Jaci -- Hicks is not the middle name of Niki's dog).

we'rehavingababyitsanARK

The Name Game -- Picking baby names was one of the very first things that we did -- I'm pretty sure we decided on names before we even told our friends that we were pregnant. After a day or so of deliberation, we decided:

Boy - George Adam Jr.

Girl - Anna Renee

We (my sister and I) even picked nicknames...

Boy - Curious George (and he would be required to carry a monkey everywhere)

Girl - Anna Banana (which also works well with the monkey theme)

The Waiting Game -- Initially, we wanted to find out the sex of our baby around the time of the wedding -- but late November was a little too early for that.

That's when I decided we should get a gender scan right before Christmas! We (or I) planned to have the technician write down the sex on a piece of paper and store it in a sealed envelope. Then, we would wait to open it on either Christmas Eve or Christmas Day -- quite a present!!!

In retrospect, I'm not sure that Adam was ever totally on board with this plan -- but he went along with it...and only attempted to sabotage it a couple of times!

So, we scheduled the gender scan for Monday -- December 22nd. We could have gone in as early as the 15th, but (knowing the limitations of my own will power) I requested a later date.

FINALLY - Dec 22nd arrives - we get to our 4:15 appointment and have to wait for what seems like forever. When we meet the technician, we tell her that we want the sex to be a surprise and ask her to follow our plan -- she agrees! The ENTIRE time we are in the room - Adam is whispering to me, "I kind of just want to know now -- what do you think...maybe we should just tell her we changed our minds." Somehow, I manage to convince him to stick to the plan. The technician prints our pictures and seals them in an envelope -- and we argue the whole way to the elevator about who gets to keep the envelope with them.

We make it from the elevator to the car before we peek...so much for will power and Christmas surprises...

Sidenote: Anyone that knows me should have guessed that we wouldn't last until Christmas -- I am the WORST at keeping surprises. I have told Adam every single gift that I have given him at least 2 days prior to the actual giving. I get it from my grandmother on my dad's side...she was the exact same way. One year we gave my mom a new handheld vacuum cleaner for her birthday. I kept my mouth shut (after receiving a series of threats from my older siblings) and everyone was SO proud of me. Then, right as she started to tear the paper -- I SHOUTED, "just one hint...it sucks things up"! I just COULD NOT wait any longer...

Anyways -- back to the peeking:


It's a GIRL!!!!!! We are having an ARK (Anna Renee Kurz)!!!!

We are both speechless -- it's that excited/terrified/anxious feeling all over again -- Adam mumbles something about a doberman and a gun collection...I start thinking about how I have no idea how to french braid hair -- then, it's back to being excited...and maybe still a little terrified. We head towards our parents' houses to surprise them with the early news!

It won't totally sink in for another 3-5 days!

The Story of Us (A family of 4-ish)

I'm not quite sure where to start -- the last couple of years, ESPECIALLY the last 6 months have been packed with exciting events and life changing experiences.

Here's what you need to know:

A little over 2 years ago I re-met a friend from my early teenage years at a wedding shower. About 3 months later -- I [allegedly] professed my love over a shared Lucky Dog on Bourbon Street during Mardi Gras (I dropped mine and sensing my great disappointment -- he offered to share). On November 29, 2008 I became Jenny Kurz; I married my best friend and my most favorite person in the world -- Adam.

We knew we would get married someday, and we knew that we wanted to have kids someday -- so, when we found out about "the bean" it didn't change our tentative plans...it just put us in fast forward mode -- and turned tentative into definite!

Oh, and scared ^#*@ out of us! -- Which I have no problem admitting. I am convinced that even the most detailed planning can not alleviate the fear of having your first baby. I mean -- it's uncharted territory...like visiting a new colony in outer space. Maybe some adventurous people can't relate to that analogy -- but I'm a BIG CHICKEN who doesn't handle change very well...so it works for me!

It should be mentioned at this point -- that although we were terrified, confused, shocked, etc... We NEVER wavered in our immediate decision to have and raise our baby.

I do think that women/couples have options. I firmly agree that the topic of abortion is a HUGE gray area (sorry to disappoint all of the teachers from my Baptist high school that tried to convince me otherwise) and that it is an EXTREMELY personal decision. But for us, because of our beliefs and our situation -- it was not an option. I think that adoption is a great alternative for people who believe that someone else can give their baby a better life. But, after less than 7 seconds of realizing that I was pregnant, no one in the world could have convinced me that someone could have given OUR baby a better life or more love than we could. So -- although it was one of the scariest decisions we have ever had to make -- it was an easy, obvious choice.

So, that explains how me, Adam and Baby Kurz came to be -- but, there is one more member of this branch of the Kurz family tree that deserves a little attention. Our slightly overweight "beagle", Belle, is the final member of our family. She was really my first shot at motherhood -- and, we pray all the time that I will do a better job with a real baby! Adam's book claims that Belle and the baby will develop a special bond...we'll DEFINITELY revisit that topic at a later date.

That's enough for today.

Oh - one last note - My mom bought our ENTIRE set of nursery furniture today!!!! It's all scheduled to arrive by the 20th.

Thanks Mom! We are SO excited about making a special place for our baby! And, we can't wait to share pictures with everyone. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU! We love you!

The Nutshell

On September 8th, 2008 -- after taking 3 pregnancy tests which all yielded positive results, I came to the conclusion that I MIGHT be pregnant.

That conclusion was confirmed on September 9th - by my OB/GYN's nurse who first assured me over the phone that 3 positives did, in fact, indicate that I was pregnant. She later assured me once more -- after giving me a blood test that I insisted was necessary "just to be 100% sure".

That really sums up the origins of this blog. I have been saying since day 1 -- or more like day 7 when the shock and complete fear momentarily subsided and I could again form sentences -- that I wanted to write about my experiences as a "preggosaurus" and, eventually, my experiences as a mom.

I could have kept a journal --- but in the spirit of "the best things in life are shared" I figured I'd let my friends and family in on this emotional roller coaster.